Okay, i thought i could write about this certain topic, but half way, i realised that i can't. Its not the main topic of death, but just the idea of unborn children and life, starts a whole slew of thoguhts and connections and i just cannot even begin to put them in words, or arrange them. A flurry of not properly processed thoughts that can be triggered by one simple idea. I have this experience or at least i used to in lit class. And i'm like, temporarily immobilised by the sheer number of things that just fly through my mind and i'm usually estatic ebcause of all the material i have for lit notes, but this time when it happened it me, all i felt was this immense load of sadness. It was all i could do to prevent the tears from flowing, though of course i was watching a particularly depressing and emotional old episode of Grey's Anatomy, so it was all the more harder. So that did occur to me that for the first time, when that experience of "flurries of thoughts" happened to me, i felt the much much differently and worse still the complete opposite. Sigh. I don't know. And i really can't get those thoughts out of my head.

Well i supposed its good that my mind's doing SOME thinking at least. As compared to vegetating which is what its ben doing the past 4 months!!!! Double Sigh. Okay, i can't bear to type any more, i gotta go cheer myself up. Mama always says never to go to bed sad, or crying. So bye children.

shini